As an avid reader I am often inspired by what I read. This book; The Gifts of imperfection by Brene Brown is no exception.

I was challenged from the offset with her list for wholehearted living, having believed I lived that way already. What about you? Check out this list and see how it sits with you.

People who live wholeheartedly have a list of do’s and a list of don’ts.

Here are the do’s:

Worthiness, play and rest, trust and faith. Authenticity and hope. Love and belonging. Joy, gratitude and creativity.

Here are the don’ts:

Perfectionism, numbing, certainty, exhaustion. Self-sufficiency, being cool, fitting in, judgement and scarcity.

So what did you discover?

Me I started to realise that I do live with a lot from the first list, but also discovered that I also live with some of the don’ts too. Exhaustion and self-sufficiency has been snapping at my heels as I have embarked on my coaching journey.

So this morning, before I had a networking Skype conversation (told you I am on a mission!) I walked with my dogs in the woods. The leaves were abundant in yellow and golds and the stream ran fast with the recent rainfall. It was not a long walk but it was an intentional one where I experienced my surroundings rather than rush through them. I held my thoughts and wholeheartedly enjoyed my dogs obvious pleasure at running together.

Here is what I am going to do. I am going to read the book and see how it changes my life, my outlook and how I live.


I am considering how this will affect my work, this list of do’s and don’ts. How will I facilitate clients to challenge how they live their lives too?

  • One exercise I use looks at how we can maximise our energy. The idea is that the focus is taken away from a myriad of concerns and focused onto an area we call ME (Maximised Energy) this area links our areas of concerns and areas of control.

If you focus on what you can do, rather than let your mind roam without censure over all your concerns, then you will gain more control.

How does this link with the lists of do’s and don’ts?

Well it causes you to focus and celebrate. To think creatively and use your intuition to see more clearly. It stands against the list of don’ts that trigger your anxiety about being perfect and self-sufficient.

A final quote before I see my next client:

‘Wholeheartedness embraces our tenderness and vulnerability as much as developing knowledge and claiming power.’